Let me tell you a little about my arrogance. I had a belief that God loved me more than other people. Then the teaching I learned in Orthodoxy says God loves us all the same. For some reason this made me heartbroken, so I was angry; and I don’t know why. I think it was because I was acting like a petulant child. So for almost a week, I quit my daily prayers, quit reading the Bible; but I did not quit praying because I can’t rebel against my Father. At best I can throw a temper tantrum. (Which I guess is a small rebellion?)
After praying for guidance and waiting for my heart to soften, I realized that God does love us all the same but uniquely. My relationship with God depends on me and how close I want to come to Him. Since I am unique, He approaches me uniquely. Maybe that’s why Paul says, “Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.” (Philippians 2:12-13)